Fast car

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Continued from here.

"I'm not worried about wanting to hear it," Wesley said. "If I didn't want to, I wouldn't ask. I'm more worried about it upsetting you. Talking about it, that is."

Comments

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"Because I can't see how it would be anything but denial," Wesley said. "It wouldn't actually be not caring. It would just be telling yourself that you didn't care." He frowned. "And by 'you' I mean me."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"And you're not going to let any of it go." Spike looked back out at the road ahead of them. He knew how miserable it was to hold onto every painful memory so tightly, and it galled him that he couldn't do anything to help Wesley see things differently.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"I don't know how." Wesley sighed. "But it's okay. I'm fine. And it's not as if the memories that are furthest away don't... fade, with time."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Fine wasn't good enough for Spike; he wanted Wesley to be happy, to be as free from cares and self-recrimination as was possible while still being, well, Wesley. "Is this part of your guilt thing? Constantly remembering so you won't do it again or some rot like that?" Realizing how his questions might be taken, he added, "I'm not being critical." He grinned a bit sheepishly. "Not much, anyway. I'm just trying to understand."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"I'm not doing it on purpose," Wesley said softly, not turning his head to look at Spike. "It's not as if I want this."