Eventually they'll... get up.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Continued from here.

"It's not as simple as 'like,'" Wesley said, tracing a graceful eyebrow with his fingertip. "Love it. Love you -- all of you. Everything."

Comments

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Spike nearly had to close his eyes at the ache in his chest, this time from embarrassingly intense gratitude instead of pain. "Thank you," he said very softly. "I love you, too."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"Shh," Wesley said, mock-sternly, unbelievably moved by how touched Spike seemed to be at the simple words. He'd express these emotions repeatedly, no matter how difficult it might be for him, if it meant something to Spike. "I'm the one talking now. You just have to listen."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"I thought you wanted audience participation," Spike said, trying to regain at least some of his composure before he made as much of a fool of himself as he had the night before.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Wesley covered Spike's lips with two fingers. "That was before -- this is now. Now, you will be quiet and listen to what I have to say." He left his hand where it was, and started, "I love that loyalty is so important to you, and I promise I'm going to do my best to live up to your expectations -- not just because I want to, but because you deserve that."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Spike kissed Wesley's fingers before moving them gently away from his mouth. He was more bothered by Wesley's statement than he was warmed. "I don't want you to try to live up to whatever you think my expectations are," he said. "I want you to do what makes you happy."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"Being with you makes me happy," Wesley said.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Here I am," Spike said, forcing himself to smile though he really wanted to question whether Wesley's words were true. He didn't seem all that happy.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Trying to get back on track, Wesley asked, "Am I allowed to continue now?"

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"There's more?" Spike asked, uncomfortable at the thought. He craved the reassurance, but on some level he didn't want to hear it. He didn't want words that could be taken back later. It was easier without them.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Wesley withdrew slightly. "Not if you don't want there to be."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Well, that was the wrong thing to say, wasn't it?, Spike thought as the warm light in Wesley's eyes dimmed. "I don't want you to censor yourself for me, pet." He tried to give Wesley an encouraging smile, even though it wasn't in his own best interest. "If you've got something you want to say, let's hear it."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"I just... I want you to understand why you're so important to me." Wesley took a deep breath and tried again. "I love that you want to put my needs before your own, even if I do find it infuriating. I love that you're willing to forgive me when I fuck up." That last was so valuable that his voice trembled as he said it.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Of course I am; I'm in love with you," Spike said, reaching out to take Wesley's hand again and unable to look away from the emotion in his eyes. "And you haven't fucked anything up yet."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Wesley dropped his own gaze for a second or two, but he had to look at Spike again. "I appreciate the reassurance, but I know that I did." He was near tears at having heard Spike say 'in love with,' which somehow was different than just saying 'love.'

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Don't be so bloody hard on yourself all of the time," Spike said, his voice still gentle. "We aren't going to agree on everything; it's not the end of the world."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"We don't have to agree, but if I'm going to hurt you when I think I'm helping..." Wesley's eyes searched Spike's, quite possibly begging for more reassurance.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Then I'll tell you, and I expect you to do the same for me." Spike released Wesley's hand to stroke the tips of his fingers down his cheek, trying to give him the comfort he obviously needed. "I know you don't want to hurt me, so I'll forgive you if you do without meaning to. All right?"

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"All right," Wesley said, agreeing but still uncertain.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Wesley didn't look convinced. "I'm still here, aren't I?" Spike said.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"You are." Wesley smiled tentatively. "I don't have a lot of experience with being forgiven. It might take me some time to get the hang of it."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Smiling in return, Spike laid his hand back over Wesley's. "There isn't much I wouldn't forgive, pet."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"I'm going to try not to do anything else that requires forgiveness," Wesley said, rather stubbornly.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"I'm sure we both will," Spike replied.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"You are quite possibly the most amazing person I've ever met," Wesley said, wondering if this might be an acceptable time to kiss Spike.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"You just haven't met the right people, then," Spike said, though he couldn't hide his pleasure at the compliment.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"While I suspect that's inarguably true," Wesley told him, "it doesn't change the facts. You're incredible. Truly."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

If he were to be honest, Spike didn't feel incredible, but he didn't want to argue. "Thank you," he said, looking at their hands lying entwined between them.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

After a few moments' silence, Wesley moved forward and brushed his lips over Spike's lightly.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Grateful for the gesture even more than the words as an indication that things were all right between them, Spike leaned into the kiss, deepening it just slightly.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Wesley would have been perfectly happy to continue, but he pulled back reluctantly and looked at Spike. "You're supposed to be resting."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"And you're supposed to be distracting me from my headache," Spike said, tracing Wesley's lower lip with his thumb. "Kissing you is distracting."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"I'm certainly happy to continue," Wesley said. "If you're sure it's helping."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Spike smiled and slid his arm around Wesley's waist to pull him closer. "Trust me."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

With his body settled against Spike's, Wesley couldn't help but feel more relaxed. He slid a hand into Spike's hair and kissed him again, still gently, mindful of the lingering hangover.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Just being near Wesley, their lips moving together softly and without urgency, was very soothing. "I'm feeling better already," Spike murmured.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"Oh good," Wesley said the next time their mouths parted long enough to get a few words out. "Because I could do this for a long time."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Bringing us back to the refrigerator in the bedroom idea," Spike said with a grin before kissing Wesley again.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"It's a very good idea." Wesley pouted slightly into the next kiss.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Spike gently sucked Wesley's lower lip into his mouth. "I wasn't arguing, though we might want a microwave, too."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"Maybe when we move we can get a large open concept flat and just arrange it creatively." Wesley slid a hand down to the small of Spike's back.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"Sounds to me like you just want to arrange everything in arm's reach of the bed," Spike said. "Which isn't that bad of an idea."

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

"See?" Wesley said, with his lips nearly touching Spike's. "As you keep reminding me, there are benefits to being intelligent."

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

"And benefits to living with someone who is. You do the planning, and I'll do the lifting." Spike leaned forward the short distance to bring their mouths back together again.

[wesleysgirl.livejournal.com]

Wesley moaned softly into the kiss, grateful for Spike's presence and the physical contact.

[flaming-muse.livejournal.com]

Continues here (http://www.livejournal.com/community/reality_bends/29285.html).